Vows
One of the most common struggles that many couples face is writing their wedding vows. Most people find it hard to express their love in words. Combine this with the inevitable nerves and anxiety that come with making this public declaration in front of family and friends and all of a sudden it becomes a daunting task!
But don’t stress… Here are some tips for writing personal, meaningful and memorable wedding vows.
Firstly, in Australia at all legal civil wedding ceremonies the bride and groom must start their vows with the following sentence:
“I call upon the persons here present to witness that I, NAME, take thee, NAME, to be my lawful wedded husband/wife/spouse/partner in marriage”.
Or words to that effect…
The rest of the vow is up to you…
Here are some tips when it comes to writing your vows:
Write your vows for your partner – not your guests. It doesn’t matter if your guests laugh, cry, think they are soppy. This is your moment to make your vow to your partner – no one else.
What would you like to promise to your partner (serious and light-hearted)?
Are there parts of your relationship you would like to emphasize?
Feel free to use attributes to describe your love, your partner and your relationship.
Do you have special names, words or sayings that are just between you and your partner?
What does marrying this person mean to you? How does it make you feel?
If you want to add some humour:
What makes them unique? (“As soon as I saw you, I loved your big biceps!")
What are you prepared to put up with! (“I will put up with your snoring/OCD/video games!”)
What promises will you make, and at what cost? ("I promise to always cook you dinner, even though you are the fussiest eater I have ever met!")
Try this format:
What do you love? Love about them, your relationship, what are their best qualities?
What's changed? How have they made you and your life better?
What do you promise? What does marriage mean to you? What do you foresee/hope for your future?
Remember the following:
Try not to talk for too long! Quality not quantity. Around ~150 words is good!
Vows should reflect on the past but most importantly, look towards your future together.
Don’t stray from your personality – serious, fun, light-hearted – stay true to yourself.
Above all, they must be sincere.
Run your vows past Kirk any time! Have fun writing your vows and remember as long as you are honest, you can’t go wrong. Good luck!
Vow samples here.